the turks and caicos trip...the details.

the day before we left for TCI (as turks and caicos is known as), dad had to go in for a reading of his latest scan and his chemo treatment. he'd had a new scan b/c of new worrisome pains. turns out drug #1, torisel, has stopped working. he just started in january. so on to something else called votrient. more convenient since it's just four pills a day (on top of all the others he takes now) and he doesn't need to have an iv infusion once a week. he also started a new drug to help build up his bone density. forget the name of that one. he started his new treatment that day. turns out it was a bad idea. way bad idea. should have just waited a week.

we left for tci on thursday and the trip started super well and smoothly. dad could eat, seemed to be enjoying himself and had some energy. then we landed through some bumpy air for a gas stop and to pick up a required life raft in fort lauderdale. and he got nauseous. and felt pretty shitty for the rest of that 1 hour flight to tci. as we waited to go through customs (super quick) and waited for the rental car, i could tell he was miserable. he hadn't had his naproxin yet so i offered to get it... he seemed to think it was too much effort to get it out of the bag and find some water. luckily enough there was a water cooler right next to him and i easily found the big bottle of naproxen amid all of his big bag of drugs. he now gets to take oxycodone for the pain when he needs it and i joke that i'm totally going to steal it and sell it on the black market... wonder how much i could make?! what's the going rate these days?! anyways, we go to the villa (pictures of that in another post) and he immediately finds his room and bed and is done for the rest of the evening.

the next day he looks like complete and total shit. just shitty. he's in bed most of the day that day too. and when he takes his temp, it's above 101. when i heard that i sort of freaked. mom had had to leave to go to her writing group while dad was getting his treatment so i'd stayed with him and the nurses told me that with these new drugs, if his temp went above 101 he needed to go to the EC (emergency center). they had said he might get a slight fever and that was ok. but the 101 was the ec mark. so i freaked. and we called his houston PA (physician asst) to find out what to do only she was gone for the day so we talked to the doc on call. he said dad probably needed more fluids but he wasn't too concerned. then the next day. this was an all around shitty ass day.

this is friday. dad's looking shitty and sleeping. he tries to get up, bless him... but really just looks miserable. i decide to go get towels so i can enjoy the beach. i go in a swimsuit and tank top/shorts. the concierage lady asks if i'm pregnant. uh no. but thanks for calling out my biggest insecurity! yes lady, i've gained 35 pounds (since the 08 marathon) and weigh about 170lbs. thanks an f'in lot. that starts another melt down. as if i haven't had enough of those. now i need to melt down about my weight too. so i tell my mom what happened and told her to keep 'that bitch' away from me at all times as i had no desire to see her face again. and proceeded to sob. heavy hard sobs. total meltdown. dad tries to be nice 'your beautiful, you look great and there is nothing wrong with you'... all said as i sob in my mom's arms and he is sitting feeling like utter shit. and my mom tries to tell me the same thing. love my parents. i go to the beach. it's a bit later and mom comes to tell me they are going to the hospital. they've talked to dad's PA and she says if you're worried enough to call from tci, then you better go. luckily tci has recently (as in 2010 or 11) completed a new hospital. since i wouldn't be much help i decided to stay on the beach and let my brother go with my mom and dad. turns out he has an infection and is dehydrated and needs a lot of fluids and antibiotics. my mom and brother came back to update me in the evening and then we all headed back with some clothes and food that he wouldn't be hungry for. he was so cold. we found him extra blankets and he just looked miserable. he spent his very first night ever for any reason in his whole life in a hospital. on tci. as there was no room for anyone to stay over night, we all went back to the hotel.

the next day, dad doesn't even remember us coming back with food or being there at all. but thankfully he is feeling better. exhausted but not miserable.

i don't really remember the rest of the days there and the order in which we did things or didn't. mom and i went snorkeling - the water was beautiful. but the current was strong and the fish really weren't anything all that exciting. dad wouldn't be able to snorkel as he was never strong enough and while if he'd really wanted to i would have 'lifeguarded' and gone with him - that too would have been too dangerous as the current was strong even for me to swim against and i'm a good strong swimmer. it just wasn't worth it. and that really sucks as that was one thing dad really had wanted to do.

eventually dad found enough energy to make it to a couple of lunches and even two dinners. but a lot of the time these new drugs were making him very very nauseous and tired. we ate at the resort one night for dinner with dad and that was nice. we'd eaten the previous few nights without him. the empty chair at the table was super hard for mom. and i heard her muse at one point, well i guess this is the future... just the three of us on vacation...and an empty chair. and it breaks my heart to know it breaks my mom's heart on top of my own broken heartedness.

we had lunch at a shitty diner as that was all we could find one day for a super late lunch. the food was disgusting and my brother was served a 'fruit plate' with a rotten brown banana and 4 slices of nasty melon. but we made up for it another day with lunch at the famous da conch shack. and dinner at lemon. da conch shack and lemon were delicious.




the service as sllllllllowwwww, but luckily it was beautiful scenery.


mom's making some music with her conch.


she bought one and here's dad blowing it. he did it twice and i tried to get it on video but our timing was off and he didn't have the energy to do it again.


i took a whole series of these pictures and i think they all turned out so beautifully and really just capture the love my parents share.

the trip wasn't all bad. TCI is gorgeous! and it was lovely having dad when he felt up to it and even when he just ate some breakfast or sat outside and got some fresh air. it was so wonderful to be able to all spend the time together and while it didn't go as planned, i'd still do it all over again. i just wish this was all some nightmare that we'd hurry up and wake up from.