and i never thought i'd do this...

i just broke up with a guy over text and what i said was: i just want you to talk to me. but since you dont want to see me or call me or really seem to even want to be with me... then i've got to call it over! i see zero effort being made on your part and i'm tired of feeling the way i am.

i don't even know if i'll get a response. i'm so hurt.

but, he's just a guy, right? i actually thought this one could be a good one. it started off so well... but don't they all. they start off by saying the right things and holding your hand and making you feel special. and then, then they get confused. really?!

last week (and all of this is the very very condensed version), after thinking over his whole confusion thing i decided that i was ready to call it quits. it didn't have to be a full on quit, but i told him i thought we should see other people. to that he said woah woah, let's not be so rash... let's take a few days and cool off and then talk about that. so i agreed. fast forward to today and we were supposed to get together tonight. he texted me an 'i'm sorry but i have to cxl'. really!? no explanation, no phone call?? wtf?? i finally heard back from him and basically it was in a not so fabulous tone that he had to cancel b/c he had a 730am bfast with a person who might be hiring'. great. fantastic excuse. really? he can't even come over so we can discuss this? i see where i fit in. i don't. and that's finally been made so clear to me. so after talking to many friends about the whole situation, i truly knew he didn't deserve me and i certainly didn't deserve his bs. i would have liked a little more closure... but i guess i have to move on without it.

i'll be tossing his stupid toothbrush off the balcony or perhaps so as not to be a litter bug, just in to the trash can. but throwing it would feel so much better!

i feel lucky to have such great friends who remind me that i don't need this crap and that there are plenty of other guys out there. even otis is telling me this as he sits in my lap and purs. he just started sitting on my lap in the last couple of weeks. he's kinda heavy, but i love that little bugger. and he always has unconditional love for me.